Long-term Consequences

Well, first I apologize for it being so long since my last post. Last week I was at a training conference and gone all week. This past week seemed busy with a more serious call load than normal.

Anyway, Tim's last few posts got me thinking about the long-term consequences I see everyday. It is truly amazing how influential childhood circumstances can be in an individual's life; it literally can be lifelong. I find myself asking, "what if someone had cared enough?"......cared enough to spend that quality time with their child, cared enough to offer support and encouragement, cared enough to simply display genuine interest in the life in their life? What could have been?

All too often, I witness the personal and emotional needs and difficulties of parents being placed in front of their children, preventing any positive personal interaction. Too often, drug and alcohol addictions, poor relationships, emotional struggles, socio-economic status, and other conditions limiting human functioning seem to overwhelm many families. These traits usually become instilled in children and the trend is passed down.

While my statements above seem to lack thoughtful analysis, I am perfectly aware all of us endure hardship at one point. I am more addressing the extreme cases where literally the family system does not display any signs of healthy functioning. Growing up myself in a lower-middle class status, my parents struggled with finances and my mother endured some harsh circumstances as a child which effect her today----but they did not prevent our family from practicing healthy habits and functioning as a family unit.

Having a child requires RESPONSIBILITY! It automatically implies effort and self sacrifice. The goal is to provide your child with love and support and help them develop skills to live an emotionally, physically, and mentally successful life. Children cannot raise themselves. They are adaptive and learn by example. Their functioning depends on the people around them, especially parents. If you want to raise children, please, put them first!